Wednesday, May 23, 2012

33 Weeks: Goodbyes & Bunnies

(Ian had to rush off to physical therapy so I couldn't get another pic today after running my fingers through my hair!  Oh well.)

(Before he left, Ian thought the bunny's new home should be in the hallway - temporarily.  So I decided to pick him/her up and take a pic!  For an explanation on why we have a bunny, see below.)

According to Julia this is my "golden week" where my baby's weekly development matches my age - 33 weeks and I'm 33!  It is crazy that I am past the 8 month mark; in a way I never thought I'd get here and it's still so hard to wrap my head around, but here I am and this little girl is still growing, growing, growing!

This week I was hoping to go to a rarely offered prenatal couples yoga and massage class at my yoga studio but it was cancelled due to not enough couples signing up.  I was so bummed because it was the perfect thing to do on a Friday night and Ian and I could have learned so many techniques to help during labor but no one was interested, so dumb.  So, our Friday night didn't go as planned but that gave us time to clean the house and get ready for our maternity photo session on Saturday morning.

Friday was also the last day for Seniors at our school and so I said goodbye to some of my favorite people last week.  I wrote about this last year, and what it's like for teachers, so I won't write about it again but it is so bittersweet.  (These students are no longer students at our school, I will not post names and they are all over 18 so it is totally legit that I can post their pictures here - my disclaimer.)

 (Sorry if some of these are blurry, kids took the pics!)

The senior prank this year was releasing some rabbits and baby chicks in the hallway on the last day.  Normally they just tag the school but this time it was worse because it involved baby animals.  My husband's classroom (he teaches Special Education) gathered up all of the stray animals (20 baby chicks and 2 baby bunnies) and found homes for them.  One of his assistants took the chicks, another teacher took a bunny and guess who ended up with the other bunny?  We did!  (That makes 11 animals at our house now, if you're counting.)

(The students wrote a 1 and 2 on the bunnies' ears - for 2012.  They shaved them and wrote it in permanent marker, so sad.  Some of the kids said there were more bunnies that kids picked up and kept and some kids said there were more chicks too but some got stepped on.  So awful.)

(He wanted to bring him/her to school today, I said no and that today was about getting work done so we could leave early and not about bunnies.  But seriously, how handsome is my almost 32 year old husband?!)

I'm still trying to decide if we are going to keep the bunny or give him/her away (Ian's sister wants him/her if we do).  It is up to me this time because Ian got a parrot a couple of months ago and we decided that he was our absolutely LAST pet.  It is just another animal to take care of, when we clearly have a baby on the way, but we are both so in love with him/her.  We put him/her outside in the mornings and evenings (we made a fenced off area so he/she could hop around in the grass) and at night we let him/her hop around in the living room with us.  He/she is seriously the most cuddly, lovable bunny I've ever seen (even though I really know nothing about bunnies), and even when we walk out of the room he/she follows us.  I can't decide what to do, I'm just so in love but am trying to be responsible!  (Ian of course says the bunny is a sign of fertility and labor so he thinks it's a sign that we have it.  Of course he does.)

Our maternity photo shoot was the next morning, with my friend June, and it was tough finding things to wear and I got frustrated trying to figure it out.  I woke up super early, did my hair and makeup and then pulled out the only clothes that fit me right now (and that aren't work clothes) and was disappointed.  I always thought I'd have such cute style as a pregnant lady but it's just tough to want to spend lots of money on clothes you probably won't wear that much longer, hard to justify the cost.  I have gotten a few things but thrift stores are the best bet because clothes are used, you don't wear them very long anyway and they are cheap.  So here I was about to take really cute pics and I had no cute clothes to wear.  I ended up making it work (of course!) and we took pics for about 3 hours all around our house, and got some REALLY cute ones.  I can't wait to see a preview of them and then the real photos - I'm dying of anticipation (and will of course post some when I get them!).  June was amazing, it was super relaxed and she was so encouraging even when I felt ugly in some shots!  Ian was happy to have worked with her too, someone we know and someone so easy going, we both had a lot of fun!

(The morning started off with my tea smiling at me so I knew it HAD to be a good day!)

(The only shady spot in our back yard at 11am!)

Then we were off to our 2nd hypnobirthing class.  This time we learned some breathing techniques, three different ones - one for no surges (contractions), one during a surge and one when it's time to push (which they also have another word for but I forgot it).  We also watched some videos of ladies delivering using hypnobirthing and it was awesome - they were so calm and relaxed, they hardly even made any sound when pushing the baby out.  I can't wait to do it!  Here are so more recent videos I found, showing hypnobirthing deliveries (if you're interested):


 And one not in a tub but easy going none-the-less:

I so wish I could do a home water birth but I'm too worried about the baby I think.  Based on our past, losing a baby, I'd like to be somewhere where there is technology available just in case something happens or we have an emergency situation.  I love being at home, and being in water seems absolutely amazing (and this is probably how I will do it next time after knowing what to expect), but I think I need to be in a hospital just in case.

We did more relaxation techniques at hypnobirthing and some more hypnosis.  It was really fun and I think last Saturday was the first time I was actually able to really relax and fall into the hypnosis aspect of it.  It's just tough because we are in a yoga room, laying on yoga mats and it isn't really comfortable so it's hard to get into it and let yourself go, compared to if you were at home in bed or on the couch.  I still love our hynobirthing teacher, Marne, and she taught us some massage stuff to practice at home which we both liked.  We rescheduled our class for this upcoming Saturday because it's Ian's birthday weekend and we are going to the Phoenix ComicCon with friends/family and so we are meeting with her again on Tuesday night instead.  Today is our last day of school so weeknights will no longer be a problem for us - woohoo!

We took a hospital tour on Monday of the hospital right by us that I am supposed to deliver at (I like it because it is SO close!).  And let's just say, I was unimpressed.  Before we left, I found a whole list of questions, online, that you are supposed to take and ask during your tour.  But, we were in a group with 4 other couples who apparently had no questions about the most important day of their lives and so it was only me asking the questions.  And, the lady doing the tour was some registration lady, not even a nurse, so she didn't know the answer to some of my questions and that left me really frustrated.  I asked her something simple like, "Do the rooms have iPod hookups?" and she couldn't even answer me.  And, some jerky husband said, "I don't think you'll have time to listen to music" and laughed at me and that really made me mad.  I told him, "We could be here for days, don't you want to know if we can listen to music or bring DVDs?"  And again he told me I wouldn't have time for that.  Are you kidding me?  Thank god he's not my husband because imagine how supportive he will be to his wife during labor if he thinks it's an in and out operation and that you will just want to sit there without music or movies.  Ridiculous!

The hospital looked really hospital like even though the section is called "Birthing Suites" and I wasn't prepared for that either.  I do not like hospitals and they project to your brain that someone is wrong or you are hurt, but labor has nothing to do with this.  I was hoping they would look more like a bedroom and less sterile, but I was wrong.  I had to save all of my medical questions because I knew she wouldn't have an answer for them and asked her afterwards if there was a nurse we could talk to instead.  She said it was a really busy day and that if I wanted to wait she would find me someone but I told her I would just come back.  It made me so upset because my questions are all over the internet, I was NOT the only person that has thought to ask them, I'm sure, but everyone we were with just stood around, not asking ANYTHING.  It was weird.  So, I will probably go back next week while we are off and see if I can talk to someone else, because it totally put a bad taste in my mouth.

Last week, with our OB, and this week with the hospital visit I realized something.  I am trying to stay positive about this whole experience but it seems that everyone around me (the doctor/hospital/etc.) are the ones putting a negative taste in my mouth about it.  I think they deliberately try to scare you so that you go into this thinking the worst and you have a hard time, instead of staying happy and relaxed about it.  I am going to continue to do my best, and be in the best mind frame, but it just sucks that everyone keeps on knocking me down,  It makes me want to take these next couple of weeks to find a midwife and birthing center instead, I DO NOT want to give my money to my doctor (who I find I am liking less and less) and this crazy hospital if I am not going to get the care I deserve or want.  However, many people have had great experiences at my hospital so maybe I just spoke with the wrong person, I am willing to give them another chance.  And my doctor - I am not really worried about because you see more of the nurses, who I'm told are pretty encouraging, so I just hope they are on board with our whole hypnobirthing philosophy once we get there.  I don't know what to do and feel like I am running out of time!

Last day of school today and I am SO EXCITED!  I don't have to come back until October 31st next year and the next time I set foot in my classroom, I will have a little baby girl at home.  It is SO WEIRD to think about but so exciting.  Ian and I will be completely different when we return, it's hard to imagine what life will be like for us then.  It is tough being a pregnant teacher, your fuse is a lot shorter and you kind of check out because you realize something way more important is happening in your life at the moment, so this year has been kind of a tough one (but definitely nothing compared to last year!).  So I am happy to be done, happy to let these Juniors go and then start fresh again next year.  We are getting 6 new teachers in our department and I think that will be SUCH a positive change, I can't wait to meet everyone when I get back.  I need this break, with my baby girl, and feel like she is really close to being here now that school is out.  This year FLEW by and last year, at this time, I never thought I'd be here - but here we are and we CAN'T WAIT to start this new chapter of our lives!!!

(Took one last look at my classroom today before saying goodbye until October 31st.  I hope I come back to everything looking like this and nothing broken or ripped down!  Next time I see this room I will be a mama of an almost 4 month old!!!)

 (Our last day of school car pic, I'm so excited for this summer!)

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